I managed to get my 30k done last week. Tomorrow is a shorter run. I think that it’ll end up being about 22km. As usual I haven’t been enjoying making decisions about where to go for my runs. Today I skipped my short run mostly because I didn’t feel like making that decision. I only had to do about 4k. It shouldn’t have been an issue but I just didn’t feel like going out there and running. It’s even a beautiful day today. I don’t know why I’ve been having so much trouble with my motivation and with getting outside for my runs. Hopefully next week will be a little better.
On my long run last week I did three 10k loops. It was nice to not have to think about where I was going but it was also difficult every time that I started a new loop. At 11k I wanted to be done my run. I didn’t feel like running a long distance that day. 10k would have been perfect. But I continued on. I actually listened to an audio-book that day. I had put the book on my phone months ago but was saving it for when I really needed. Since I wasn’t in the mood to run a long distance I decided that the run was worthy of the audio-book. I loved listening to it! It made the run way easier than it would have been otherwise. There were several times when I looked around and thought ‘how did I get here already?’. That’s exactly what I wanted to happen on that run. I still struggled again around 21k about not wanting to do another loop but then I got absorbed in the book again and was able to at least partially forget about not wanting to run any further. The book that I was listening to was Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis. What a great book! I’m looking forward to listening to the rest on my run tomorrow. It’s a book that I could listen to several times and still learn something from it every time. It actually has made me want to continue running long distances just so that I can listen to audio-books. I’m already considering another half marathon at the end of May.
I was very sore from my long run! Walking down the stairs was painful. I found myself walking down sideways at home where no one was watching in an attempt to avoid the pain. It took a full two days for the pain to ease off at all and then my legs just felt slightly sore and still quite tired. I think that they need the shorter run this week. I’m hoping that they’ll be fully recovered before my long run next week.
Yesterday I used the rowing machine at the gym after my run. I think that maybe I’ll try to make a habit of using it more often. It might be a good cross-training tool for me. It doesn’t hurt my calves but I really felt it in my hamstrings. My arms are the part of me that is most sore today though. I only did about 15 minutes on the machine yesterday. I didn’t want to overdo it when I had no idea how it would effect my body.
I’ve been recognizing conflict a lot more since the talk that I went to almost 2 weeks ago. Today I had to call the bread company to try to get my record of employment. They are really starting to annoy me! I e-mailed them the first time 17 days ago to get my record of employment. I didn’t hear anything back but assumed that it would be sent in the mail and that I would receive it within a week. I waited, and waited and waited. Finally I called them last week and left a message explaining why I was calling and asking them to return my call. That evening, after not having my call returned, I also e-mailed them at two different e-mail addresses. In the e-mail I asked them to let me know when they’ve sent the ROE to me so that I will know to expect it (and will not be sitting at home fuming and trying to figure out what my next step should be). I still heard nothing so today I called them again. I finally got ahold of one of the owners. She said that the lady that does the ROE’s is away this week (no mention of where she’s been for the past two weeks) and that he partner was gone for the day but that he is aware of my request. I asked her again to at least let me know when they’ve sent it out. I plan to continue hounding them until I get it. I’m soooo glad that I got ‘fired’ from that job. What a disorganized company it is. Sending out ROE’s should be a simple standard task that they would have to do regularly and it shouldn’t be so difficult. I realized during my two days there that they have a huge turnover of employees so despite being a small company they probably have to fill out ROEs fairly often. I’m really hoping that this will be resolved quickly because it annoys me to have to deal with it and try to figure out what steps I should be taking to get them to send this to me. There is no reason why this should even be an issue. If nothing else at least this makes me more aware that I really dodged a bullet in not getting too involved with the company and I’m even more happy that I’m not working for them.
I had an interview yesterday. I really don’t know if it went well or not. I think that I answered some of the questions well but there was one question that I just completely went blank on when they asked me. After a lot of ums and uhs I finally gave some sort of response but I’m not even sure if it actually answered the question. Oh well. I’ll take the job if I get it but I don’t think that I really want it. It will be 1.5-2hrs of commuting every day. I will also be on-call 7 days a week for the entire summer. I hate being on-call. It makes it so hard to have a life when you don’t know when you might be working. The job itself doesn’t sound like much fun either. The more that I think about it the more that I hope that I don’t get it. If it was closer I think I wouldn’t mind as much but that commute is going to reduce the amount of free time that I have drastically and my free time is what I live for. The job is not going to be satisfying so my time away from work will be even more precious to me. I might have to talk to EI and see if the commute and the pay (since it’s less than my last job) are good enough reasons for me to refuse the job if it is offered to me. (even though I’m not even on EI now because I’m waiting for that stupid ROE)
I really need to figure out what to do with my life. It’s been getting me down lately. I did another career test last week. #21 on the list was embalmer. Three times ‘funeral director’ has come up and now embalmer has too. So, basically I’m best suited to work with dead people. Excellent. I actually keep thinking that I really should at least look into it. Who knows, maybe it’s exactly what I’m looking for. I also keep thinking that I’d love to do something that involves healthy eating and living. I don’t feel that I have to skills that I need to do this but it’s something that I feel passionate about. I don’t know how I could do it or what type of job I could have but the idea excites me. I would love to do something like go work with a family for a week or two or a month and help them to switch their eating habits and foods over to healthier options. But I don’t have as much knowledge as I would need and I also don’t have the cooking skills that I would need. Oh and I don’t have the people to do it for. But I’ll keep it in the back of my mind and look for ways of learning. One of my friends suggested that maybe I should just start writing all the things that interest me and that I love to do without thinking of them in terms of a job. I think that this is a great idea, but I haven’t started to do it yet. Maybe I’ll start while I’m on the train tonight. Most of the time I think about what I love and can’t see how it provide me with employment and so I get frustrated and annoyed. I tell myself that I have no skills and I’m not smart enough or good enough… It’s really a bad cycle that I try to stop quickly when I recognize that I’m doing it. But if I think about what I love without the stress of thinking of a job it will keep things more positive and may help me to see my strengths and my passions a little more clearly.
My friend and I made homemade perogies last weekend. It is probably the only time that either of us will ever make them. It took us about 3 hours. We decided to make whole wheat perogies even though we had never even heard of such a thing before. But neither of us are very picky and we both like to try and make things healthy when possible. The perogies were a lot of work.
They weren’t the prettiest perogies we’ve ever seen but they tasted not bad. We found theme to have a little too much dough for our liking but the fillings were pretty good. I loved the potato and cheddar filling. We also made sweet potato and feta, and a cottage cheese, ricotta, spinach filling. The last one was our least favorite of the three. We had no idea how much to make and didn’t really bother with following amounts on the recipes that we were using. We had a lot of leftover filling to use up. Neither of us had any desire to make more dough and roll the dough and fill the dough and try to keep the filling inside the dough and keep the dough from sticking to the counter and make it look pretty and also keep it from getting soggy after being filled… so we decided to make a layered casserole thing. I had some homemade tortillas in the freezer so I pulled them out and defrosted them. We then layered the three fillings with tortillas in between and threw it in the oven to bake. It ended up tasting pretty good. I don’t think that I’ve eaten that much potato in years. I’m not a big potato fan. I usually (but not always) take a small scoop at holiday meals a couple of times a year and that’s about all that I eat in a year. I sometimes will order yam fries at a restaurant but I never order potato fries. Sometimes if a really yummy sounding meal comes with potatoes at a restaurant I will order something else simply because the potatoes don’t appeal to me. I’m not sure why I don’t just ask for a substitution. So, I was surprised that I enjoyed our casserole so much. It must have been all the cheese.